Time keeps going on,
then feeling grows up or down, and
our next action is decided from our own (hopefully) wise thought.
When I truly realized that I can't and I should't have everything for myself,
I realized that I should make the best possible decision ever for my own condition.
No decision will be perfect, but there will be decision that suits the most for me.
It all started from doing things at my best.
Then I will get varies of feedback; But the feedback that touched my heart, surely is special.
Nobody would be unhappy and not wanting more when something very good touches our heart.
But something happy does not always stay in a longer time,
sometimes the happiness might just stay for some years.
Here comes the taking-decision-role should take a part.
Whether do we decide to go for more, or decide
to just let it stay as a feeling that comes in our life and just be casual (not doing more).
Making a decision mostly gives me hard times.
It's not just because making decision will always be hard,
but once I feel something, the feeling is so deep, and I truly realized that deep feeling I have.
It's even harder to make decision because somehow, I want to decide based on what I feel,
but this mind of mine thinks so much that I try to hold myself not to decide so fast.
Even though I know that any kind of decision is very okay (as long as it's not harmful),
because it's better to make the decision & realized that there can be plus&minus effect,
rather than not deciding anything & I will never learn something;
but it's still hard for me to make a decision.
At this state of confusion,
I surely need God to help me decide.
It's by surrender what I feel to God and
let God gives the answer by showing me what happens next to my life.
So, the only thing I know to do is; keep doing things at my best,
do right things as I can, and open-wide my mind that everything can happen because God let it happened, not because I have worked and did hard for it to happened.
The only thing I really hope is,
if it's not for me, please take it out faster from my life.
It's freaking suffering for me to be confused of what should I decide for a very big range of time.
E N D 💛
Komentar