taniaangel.

Tomorrow will be Christmas! MERRY CHRISTMAS to everyone who read this! Tomorrow I'll have Christmas celebration at GMS :) Love yaa :* hmm, today's wish, I could have better Christmas than before... But actually, my heart is break now because I felt I'm not really absent in people's eyes who are actually I love them :'( GOOD NIGHT

I'm done in every exams that I had! Yeayyy! Let's party :p hahaha. I got 5remedials when the final examination has overed & I actually sad of it :( it just like I'm the only one who don't want to work hard for it! Geezzz! And left this week to have my schools & next week will be my holiday. Before, this week my school will have Christmas Celebration too. It's around 1hour for a Celebration. I wish I could bring my camera to take some photos there :))) WISMILAK! Haha. Then for my holidays, I've got list to do in these holiday already. I will re-smoothing my hair, celebrating Christmas at church, having some hang outs with friends, learning to drive car, & many more. And actually I wish I could buy some clothes too :) now, I should have a little by little change :pp wkwkwk. I love to see beautiful dress as I love everythings UNIQUE! But I wasn't that brave to have it :p hahaha. Okay, many days I've passed. And actually I'm kinda lazy to wri...

Hmm, these days I'm so lazy of updating this blog even I'm lazy to arrange the view. It has looked so bored now & I'm hardly to change the settings too. This is semester week & last weeks were my block examination week. I think, I'm not so good in answering those questions, but I hope the best from what I've learned. Please wish me luck for my examination :) I really don't know anymore with my physics :( really hard to solve the questions =.= I'm rarely text my friends now, I don't know why I could be bored of texting people. Maybe it was because I got no one to chat again? Hmm. My cell phone does really so quite. Haysss~ okay, I've owned my own camera optical -Canon 7D- and a big wish to have a lot of photos with me and Jessica, and even Fumiko. Hmm, now I'm really sleepy now. WIsh me luck always :))) :DDD in the JESUS name, we Pray. AMEN :)

Hi there? Miss me so much huh? A lot things I've done. And it's hard to tell u one by one :) the old Connect Group Youth 12 has just separated and borned a new leader, Novalisa. I really congrats to her :) she is back as a leader again as she has ever been a leader when we were Eagle Teens :) But I was not the same Connect Group with her anymore, I'm still the child of Ono :)) it's okay, nevermind :D This month is final examination month with December. I should study more lorr~ anyway, my scores have increases than last month :) thanks for Your blessing Dad :))) only some lessons that get lower score. Wish me luck for the final examination yaa :) GMS got some competitions to build our unity and to have some fun :) I wasn't joining any of it, but actually I want to join photography competition. But I think, it hasn't the time for me to join it. I'm gonna wait for my DSLR and I'll surely joining all photography competitions if it's not disturbing my sc...

Gyaaaaaa~ miss ya blog! Haha, I'm now at KFC Medan Mall having free onlining here with KFC's computer :))) I was first prefer to open twitter, but suddenl I missed blogging :) Time walks so fast yah! I felt that 2009's Christmast just happened and it's almost 2010's Christmast :))) really fast, huh? Here, I met my church's people, yah, I think she doesn't know me at all. Then met my old friends from Prime One School, Kenny Wongso & Danny Wongso. They aren't sitting together. Danny sit with his friend & Kenny sit alone. Hmph~ I was here because my brother -Roberto Budiyanto- is having his birthday today and we celebrated it here :) okay, no more talks again that come in my thoughts. I'm gonna off yeah :) Love you :333

Really bored of today :( no one is around me today, no really no one :( i totally missed a lot of ppl now especially someone far there :'( how are yaa them? I missed them so really hen much >.

These days I got a lot of examination. hmph~ 'till idunno what should I do only in my school's stuffs. I even forget what should I do, I mean, what homework that I got. Tomorrow will be my BIOLOGY examination ad guess what? I even dunno about the topic that I learned :( BIOLOGY is really refers to a lesson where a lot of Latin words inside :( memorising Latin words should be really hard. Today, I've finished designing for my cell group photo. It wasn't looked great for me, but my dad and my young brother said it's nice. You could see the design here . Okay, I'm gonna tell you something what did I do while I felt nothing to do evryday and even everytime. I really love sending something like people called as "FOWARD message" but it was made by me & it surely different everyday. And I always write everything that I wanna shout in it but I only gave it for some people. And someone who I always give the message is Fumiko's Indonesian number. Yeah, ...

Okay, I forget to add some more things just now, I just make the new ones. I'm thinking of someone who shouldn't I loved *as what my lasts blog that I posted* again :( and now stupidity *owh, not that stupid* I think of him! NOPE la! shouldn't think of anyboy ler~ should just think for my families, best friends, close friends, my studies, my future, and my talent. And even my characters. Haaayaaaaa~ this girl is thinking too much ya! Am I so egoist or am I so negative thinker? wew. hmph~ I should be focus of what is the first and let it to the last if something what I want isn't that realy so important! YEAH! okay, this time I'm gonna really off! Searching for my dad's songs for Sunday church first than off the NOTEBOOK and study for my PKN! See yah! Mwah!

Today is a really busy day actually. Having plus score for physics from Sir. Samar from Chapter 3, should study PKN for tomorrow's examination and doing my drawings. And I haven't finished all of them :(((((((((( I'm to great to say :( Huah! From yesterday, I study my PKN but 'till now I even don't understand it from the beginning and I have to study for around 20 pages of my book :( and lazily, I'm still could have some online now *really lazy person huh?* and now I'm typing really fast to have everything faster :))) Hahah, today, fumiko gives me her responds and all about what I was doing in for her :) sorry before yah Fumiko :) I've been really so wanting everything what I want :( and I always do a lot of silly plans :( I miss u really so much! Okay, I couldn't have more onlines :( cause my parents has gone home! BYE!

Last days, I was thinking of an idea which I try to not look for Fumiko. I try to not really talk or miss her *but actually she is the one that i missed so much*. I just sometimes responded her tweets *that's not really an important ones* and not bbm-ing her. In facebook, we are on a discussing, so it's not really influenced. But maybe we gonna off our discussion too in facebook. I try to wait for her. Wait her to look for me, finding information about me, or everything about me :) but what I got it's not really something I want. Maybe it's because that has been her character. Hehe. Idk too. I wish she could look for me and even so worried about me. That's all what I want. I wanna see, does she really missed me or not? Or I'm also nothing for her just like others? Or maybe I'm just like her bodyguard? Hmm, I'm sure she's not someone like that. I wish she reliezes it :) ♥ hmph~ okay, no more talking too much. Should be off! Parents have gone home alre...

Sighs~ Rupanya minggu nih banyak kali kerjaanku. I have a lot of things to do for this week! Lazy to mention them :( What a busy is that? I think, I'm not really gonna have a lot of rests this week :( should study more to improve my scores and average and wish I could have a better rank than before :) and I'm really shocked or maybe crazy of PHYSICS! Last week, I just had my physics examination for chapter 2. Then in this week on Wednesday, I'm gonna have something like examination for plus score about chapter3! Haisss~ I planned to study Chemistry and Math this week, but maybe it'll be canceled. Cause on Thrusday and Friday, I will have my PKN and Hostory test. Beneran bisa jadi gila tar. This is not my type. This is a really clever person type. And I was entering the wrong class. Oh NO! No, no, no! I shouldn't have this thoughts, I have to be thankful of GOD! REMEMBER THAT TANIA! Because what I wish is to be clever and I think this is the only way to be clever. Ha...

These days, I feel more problems in this world. 'Till my head couldn't be filled again and I have to cry :( actually it's not a cry, but it's a feeling where I can't express about. I wanna shout, I can't. I wanna everythings based on my wants, I can't. I wanna ignored it, but I can't too :( okay, I'm gonna just write everything that passes my mind... I think, I'm really not gonna open my heart for any opposite-sexs. Because, if it happens, I couldn't stop thinking of that person and the worse is when he doesn't like me, my head gonna think more about him :( thinking about any ideas that could make him love me :( I have my integrity and I should do it! This integrity should I keep really well 'till the end of school's life. I'm really so crazy about it. Whatever people said or what I think, I should do what I've promised. Aduh~ reall :( so really :( I shouldn't love someone! And actually I've loved a wrong person :(...

A girl onlining to replies all what people says, having the 1st day of 15 years. Having lots of gifts and the most and best gifts are from Jesus :) not just a thing, but some lessons that she could learn about it. Today, she was going to Sun Plaza @ 11:30 to have a day with Fumiko :))) they went for taking photobox picture and having lunch @ Mr. Pancake. Then, went to Amazone; playing Basketball once and have some songs @ the karoake. She should go for church and serve the souls @ 2 p.m, but Miko wants her to still be with Miko. Luckily, ci Sylvia wanted to replace her :))) she entered Youth when the worship song was going to start. She invited Miko to join it, but Miko scared that she shouldn't enter her church. Hahaha. She was really happy, God give it as her gift. Then, in the middle of the preech section, Miko's mom called Miko to go home. She compannied Miko and couldn't have youth today. She'll join the 3rd section of church. After reaching @ Appolo, she met her o...

I'm gonna write some messages for my buddies now. Please have this and look for your name. My God Who Create this World: Thanks God. You've given Your Son to us who really meaningful to this world. Jesus: You are my everything, the One that I really need so much ever in this world! I'm really thankful for everything that You've sacrificed to me :) LOVE YOU Families: They are the one who sometimes sacrifice their things :))) And these, some lists that I write randomly ... Fumiko.S & Jessica.H : I wish, we could be forever eva in our life :) although we are far, but I'm sure, we do miss each others everyday like what I do :) Venny, David.L, Vina, Catherine.S, Jeslin.V, Fransisca.N: All of you have really done a great things in my life. Spending time for the only ordinary strage me :) I love you ol'! Ci Yani.M, Jordy.T, Ci Ella.H.K, Yolanda.B.M, Ci Dewi (Moni), Ko Moelyono.S.P: You are the 2nd person who cares for me everytime and who prays for me too :) ev...

Being lonely i s really hate-able. I feel really empty now. I don't know how to do. I know, it's my fault that me myself couldn't owned a lot of friends :( then I get less close friends too :( I need my friend to cheers me everyday. Texting with them is really nice, if I could. I really feel lonely because my heart is really empty now. Yea, I mean of empty is I got no close friend to make a joke on me an me too. Actually I got some, but I couldn't really match with their jokes. I think, I'm not fated to own a lot of friends, but having a little friends-some of them are closed to me-is my fate of having friends. I don't know what I'm thinking about this. But this always happens since I were in elementary 6. Last, I have lots of friends and being so easy going person until elementary 5. But now, I am really changed yah? Really confused of that. I really hope for having a lot of friends because of many reasons. But if God wanted me to have a little one, okay, I...

Whoa! It seems like, these days I post blogs yah :) Yes, it's true :) I gotta a lot of minds that I was think of and I don't know how to express it. Then I just write this blog, where I could take out some of my thoughts. Today, Monday, no flag raising ceremony, because it's gonna raining at that time. YES! But it's really useless, because I've brought my cap and tie :( it made my bag heavier *even I know it's not heavy when I put them*. I'm back to my Mafia course and I started to study more seriously. There got a new teacher :) a girl teacher. Haha. She's nice, hmm, clever too :) she's just 2years of college. When we were going home, my sister joined my cousins to go home, so I went home with her by becak and I stopped in front of Methodist-2's. Geez! My head was onced knocked by the becak's roof. So hurt. Then I almost almost fell down from the becak. At mom's shop, I was really tired. I went to toilet and when I'm gonna go back *I...

Hmph~ I don't know how to start now. I got many things to be write on, but I'm speechless too :( Do u know smile? What is the definition of smile? What is smile use? I'm confuse of one thing. Why is everybody around me less smile or laugh when we are having fun together? And why is everybody keep smiling and laughing on someone that's not supposed to be bullied? I really don't understand this. Can we just have fun by some smiles or laughs? Why everytime I face this kind of things? Could I have a really really really big fun? Big smiles of people? And even laughs? For everyone who reads this, I want u to know, smile and laugh are really important for everydays life. We should have healthy smile not unhealthy ones. I'm enough of having a little friends. But honestly, I'm really feel nothing when I was with some of them :'( even I'm really sad. Are we really friends? Even for everyone who is older or maybe naturer than me :( why don't u smile even i...

In this new school, i got a lot of problems in my studies :( I got no schedule for studying *because I was like that in the past* and I was so hardly to study just like clever students. Really, I got the lowest score ever in the class! It happened because I was placed in the clever class. Actually, I wish to moved. But then, when I've think for many times, it's God's answer for me. Huh, my lowest score is 0 and my highest score is 100 . But I owned more red-marks than black-marks. The minimum of the black-mark is 70 . Huah, really really low score, as you know. Yeah, I always keep calm everytime I got a red-mark in my examination. Because, crying for me is something useless. Why did I say about this? Because as you know, some clever student especially in the clever class , would be so broken / down when they know their score is low or red-marked. I don't want to be that kind of person, but I want to keep smiling and be thankful of what I got. Hopefully, I got some fri...

Wohooo, this time holiday is quiet long. It is one week for my holiday. Hahaha. Kinda nice yeah? But I have a job to do too during this holiday :'( I should guide my mom's shop while holiday and I just got 2 days for having fun with my families - refreshing - on Friday and Saturday. For my these 2 holidays, I went to the Kelang Beach, Tebeng, and Pantai Labu. Di Pantai Kelang, nae sampan ke jermal minta ikan. Waktu mau balik ke pantai, pas sampannya hampir sampai ke pantai, tiba" kita turun karena pasang surut. OMG!!! Pas kita jalan, rupanya ada batu karang! Hayuu~ harus pelan" jalan dan akhirnya aku yg terakhir nyampe. Uda itu, pas ge jalan mau ke pantai, cc w stengah jatuh. Dia ada bawa tas pula, jadi tasnya kena air juga. Dan hp yg disimpan ditasnya kena air jugag! Wahhh", mantebbb. Ada 6 hp pulak tuh. Untungnya sih hp aku gak kena. Hahaha. Seruuuuu mat, tapi uda males ah jalan ke pantai ge. Hwaaaa~ gak suka. Hehehe. Anw, aku dikasih cake kecil dari ii Ahiok u...

Huaha! I am so really very amazed of these two days -12th & 13th of August- that really brings alotof Medan people to know about my lovely ever Daddie Jesus GOD! It was an amazing event ever! INTERNATIONAL EVENT! Alotof people are coming in both days. I just got the result of how many of baptized soul and altar call. First day on 12th of August we got 579 of altar call and 140 people that baptized. The second day on 13th of August, we got 457 of altar call and 93 people that baptized. Great huh?? Yes, of course. Actually, i dun really know how was the event's situation. Cause i was at the back of the stage. But even for staying at the back of stage i've felt how really great is my Daddie. Dad, would U make a bigger thing than this? Cause not all of Medan wants to shout Ur name. Will U? i hope U'll. Hmm, i love YOU, my Dad...

Lalalalala~ I've moved to my new school, Yeah! Nicenicenice school. I moved @ Methodist-2. I was a little bit surprise when I first time schooled there. I was placed in X5 class -ppl called it as a cleverest class- there. Ohooo, it was making me can't stand on. I think I shouldn't listed in that class. WHY? Because my scores are so low. Really low. Actually, I got a little bit worry about this. I was thinking how would I study later? I mean in the house. Cause as ppl have known, I'm lazy. welewele. Yayah, I'll try to have more concern in my lesson -that's my plan. I heard from outer students -the one who aren't X5 student- that X5 gets alotof arrogant student. But then, after some weeks I schooled, they aren't like what ppl said. Maybe this class is different than other "5" class. What I got is they are really co-operative. No groups in this class & that's what I hoped along 4years @ POS. Okay, I think I have nothing to be shared anymor...

Today, Fumiko's birthday. And she celebrated it with me and Jessica Hariwijaya :) Even it's just around 1 and half hour, but I will never forget this moments. Yeah. Eating @Pizza Hut until my stomach is really full and needed to be emptied, haha :p Then taking picture at Photo Box for twice - almost it's not once. And that is the last of our day today :) miss ya :) happy birthday FUMIKO SUGAWARA. Last but not least, actually I don't think of this idea. It just came to my mind around 10 p.m. I forced Fumiko to sleep after 12. Then I company her in case that she won't sleep *seharusnya sih jgn temenin dia*. Then @ 12 sharp, I called her to say "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" as the last person. HAHA! :p

I had my holiday now. Yeah, happy but not really. I'm bored of my holidays. I think, it's better I go somewhere with my friends. But I think, it'll waste my money. *HAHA* so I think my holiday is getting bored and bored :((( huah! This time, I just manage my moving school. I was received by Methodist2 school. And I've done it, just left a little bit things to be done :) Gehhh, I'm really tired of my holiday and even bored with it. Holiday activities are not really much. But while at school, I could do more activities that will really make me busy 'till I'm lazy to do it. Hmph~ many people say that holiday and school are both same. There's something that we'll dislike. But for me, school is better than holiday. Yeah, I prefer to be at school. At school, I could tell stories, having problems, sing, dance, and everything. While in the holiday, I just helping my parents, online, texting, etc. Just that :( boring huh??? Yeah, that's why I prefer sch...

Yesterday was my last day school at Prime One School. I was really sad to have that. My heart is really painful to have this. But what should I do? This is my last meeting. I couldn't meet my friends, even my bestfriends again. Kinda soooooooooooo sad. I hugged Ivy, Fumiko, Jessica, Venzy, Natalyn, Melika, Evelyn, Mellyani, Meta, Afliani - only that, that I remember - warmly and touching. Hope that I could really still in the connection with them. :'( But for me, I really missed something that I want. I'm not enough to see 'him' yesterday. hwaaa~ he is really a cool guy. But I don't like him and it's impossible for me to like him. And I was really shy when Fumiko's boyfriend - Pangeran - shouted that "HE SAID THAT HE LOVES TANIA". Omygoshhh, wad's that??? Why did he say that??? And he also mention his name. OhmyGOD. grrrr, okelah nope. It's okay. Just take it as my memories. But wish I could take picture with him - even I dunno anything...

This day will end. The day when I have a lot of things to do with my friends. I'm gonna miss everything that we've passed. Do you know what? I hate to have this things, but I have no more choice to choose. Future is not something fun for me. It's a serious things to do. I'm sad, I'm hurt. I want to cry now, but I can't. It seems like something tell me to not to do so. Yeah, I'm not kids anymore. Nothing to be cried. Everything will happen like this. I'll have a good time to cry only for the first and the last for one condition. I'll really miss everything, everyone, and everytime that I have 'till I don't what to say now. Looking at past, especially for the pictures is just memories. It'll not happen again one day. Keeping them, will make me miss everything more and more. Gonna miss you, ALL OF YOU...

Hmph~ I'm now not a Junior High 3 student. U know what I mean by saying this. Something will happen so GREAT. I dunno why I feel this. But for me, after I've passed my Junior level, everything will be change again. Honestly, something will happen to me too. If u could guess it, good then. But if u can't, I will tell u later. Actually it's hard for me to have this situation. It still a big problem to me :( I'm confused with all of this. I dun want to live there. But I also dun want to stay since I already have this for almost 4 years. It's hard for me to solve this problem. Even I will sure be there, but it still confusing me. I think, 'What should I do with it?'. Then my answer is only 'I should do it all for my futureLIFE'. ♥ what u will got, then everything is gonna be fine and walk by itself. Love the goods and love the bad ones too... Okeii, I've nothing to say anymore. One day, I'll post something for my dearest people in this world!...

GO PISS OFF!!! I HATE D WAY U DID IT 2 ME! U NVR UNDRSTND ME!!! U WANT 2 MAKE ME AS UR NANNY? OK! JUZ GO ON! I DONNO WAD SHOULD I DO NOW! I'M SUFFERED OF ALL OF THIS!!! UNHEARTED PERSON! IT'S UP 2 U WAD DO U WANT 2 DO 2 ME! UDA PASRAH AKU!!! U NVR EVEN UNDRSTND ME ONCE! OK, U EVER! BUT JUZ A MOMENT! DO U KNOW HOW TIRED AM I? YA, I KNOW U'RE MORE TIRING THAN ME, BUT I'VE MY LIMIT TOO! JUZ GO WAD DO U WANT 2 DO 4 ME! U WANT 2 MAKE ME AS UR ROBOT, GO THEN. THEN I WILL SEE HOW ENOUGH ARE U MAKING ME LIKE THIS! U WANT 2 HIT ME, SLAP ME, OR ANYTHING, JUST GO ON! U'RE PLEASED 2 DO IT. BCAUSE I KNOW, I'M NOW NOT HUMAN 4 U. BUT I'M NOW A ROBOT 4 U! KEEP THIS WORDS!!!!!

heyhey!! Gettin' crazy of my house's computer. REALLY CRAZY!!! U know wad? In around 30 minutes, this computer will restart... Wad's that??? heleh~ and then, i borrowed my fren's USB for UAS exam materials. U know wad??? There's nothing inside!!! Arggghhhhhhh!!! Sick of it! It just like I wanna to KILL this computer!!!!!!!!!!!! Sick, really sick of it! I dunno how about my examination for music and IPS tomorrow. weleh~ You know, days walk so fast.. Ya, because I'm hoping these days walk so fast 'till I'm in my Senior High level. WHY? Because I hate to face those stubborn peoples! They loved to bully people and they never ever STOP or even BORED with that! Wad people are they! Really got no heart or feelings.. Hayahhh~ gonna stop talking here now. For anyone who read this blog and RELIEZE that I'm talking about u, please be aware of yourSELF! Get out from your bad habits! BAD HABITS GO AWAY forever from them!!!!!!!

I got a nice sogng when I watched "My Name Is Khan" movie. This is the lyric. Sorry, I couldn't post the song because I still hasn't found the good mp3 ones. Artist(Band):Joan Baez WE SHALL OVERCOME Words and Music by Zilphia Hart., Frank Hamilton, Guy Carawan and Pete Seeger We shall overcome, We shall overcome, We shall overcome, some day. Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe We shall overcome, some day. We’ll walk hand in hand, We’ll walk hand in hand, We’ll walk hand in hand, some day. Oh, deep in my heart, We shall live in peace, We shall live in peace, We shall live in peace, some day. Oh, deep in my heart, We shall all be free, We shall all be free, We shall all be free, some day. Oh, deep in my heart, We are not afraid, We are not afraid, We are not afraid, TODAY Oh, deep in my heart, We shall overcome, We shall overcome, We shall overcome, some day. Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe We shall overcome, some day.

Do you know? I keep loving my friends. Giving them my care. Giving them my love. Giving them everything they need. But what did I get? NOTHING!!!!! They even never think of my condition. Okay, actually I don't need their replies. But I need to see how will they appreciate people. If they don't, okay. I don't mind. It's up to them! I just want to tell this world. How much I love YOU!!!!!!!!!! & if u don't want to reply me, okay. I don't mind. But one thing, I will still love you. I come to this world to love everybody. But I don't need their reply. One more, actually that I need is THEY believe in JESUS. Because I love them. I want them to live with me too in the heaven later. Sorry, this is not about religious. But is about how much I want you to know, that I want to live with all of you till in the heaven, live together and happily.

Holas WORLD! Long time no posting... Hmm, I miss, miss, miss, miss this blog a lot... I am sick now and I have nothing to do... Many memories that I've passed... I've passed a lot of memories too with 'him' & 'Him'... Ya, 2 hims... One thing I would like to tell u... I owned a picture which in this picture --at that time-- I was really annoying of using this dress... that's all.. byeeee

Hmm, long time no posting.. gonna miss it... Actually, I got a lot of things to be written here... Tapi aku MALAS!!! But I'll try to not be lazy... hmph~ BYE PEOPLAS!! See yaa :)