taniaangel.

My body temperature is so high, and my skin is hot. My head sometimes get something like passing through and it hurts. And yes, I am stress. I am at my lowest point now. Thinking everything won't do any good. I am feeling so down right now. And again, this thought came up. If I could decide, I wanna end up my life now. E N D

I have always been confusing about deciding every choices in front of me. I am full of knowing the risks and advantages of every decisions. This time, I have to decide between some choices again. It's truly hard for me. But this time, I will just try to listen to what my heart tells me. It will be hard, but well, rather than not making any clear decision, eh? I know things will be better when I have decided what to do, but I hope nothing too bad will happen. I somehow need Kay to help me out about this. E N D

Dear Kay, I am glad to ever met and talked to you. I learnt quite much of you although we have just talked a little bit and just about ordinary things. Day goes on and on. I am waiting for our next meeting. There should be a lot of things we could share about. E N D

Finally , I am able to order online taxi after the big rain has stopped. Sitting on the White Avanza car, listening to old song, with the windows open, and luckily the air is quite windy. I enjoy what I am right now, but at the same time, I am in a full of cautions too because the car should be in closed-window and the air conditioner should be switch on. Medan, the city where I was born at, and also the city that I will love. Located on North Sumatra Province, Indonesia. Today is the first time where I spit out my love to my birthplace. It was even hard for me to leave this city when I should be thinking of where I should continue my studies after I graduate from school. I know, I look like I don't want to be out of my comfort zone, I somehow later realized about that too. But besides that reason, I have another reason too and since it will out of the topic, I won't write it here. This is the city that you will acknowledge a lot of delicious food here. Medan is all about food

This is what I am feeling these days: Are you the one or not? With this addition: Hahaha, I know I won't make it. I am fatty ass ugly and I even couldn't have diet because food is the only thing for me to get my minds off. E N D

I have been holding myself into something whether it is really from my deepest heart or not. This thing goes up and down. Sometimes I am excited about it and sometimes I am so glad that, at that time, I am not thinking about it at all. I prefer not to get into this thing, and that is the reason of my gladness. I also have been holding myself not to post about this feeling on my blog, but now, I think I couldn't hold it but to spit it here. I prayed to God to ask for a way out, but well, I am not good, because I rarely pray to God, I still haven't found any clue about this. It's not something that I want, it's just something that keep passing my mind and that keep making me curious. So funny to know that I am excited about this but honestly, I myself have never wanted to be excited though. It's very blended. All I need is a way out, an answer. And I wish I shouldn't wait too long for this thing stays in my life.