Well, as you all have read from my previous entries, I was so busy and until now keep busying. When one has done or even not yet done, the other one comes again. And it keep repeating all the time.
And one thing I always felt about.
Why everything always comes and most of them is something a must for me?
I was about so stressful to think about it. Sometimes I really need to have rest of this mind. But I couldn't. Once I stopped accepting a job, the other job comes to me. And that other job I have no choice to ignore it. It has always been like that every time. And I don't have a really good time to do what I'm specialize and happy of. My head is about to keep exploding all the time.
It's hard to tell you what things that I should do only. So, it's hard to share to even a person for this. And I really think that a lot of people want to chase for a lot of things so that they also need a lot of people's helps. Well, I am willing to help but the thing that is hard for me to accept this is, I really don't have a good time with the others stuff that I wanna do.
Actually, almost everyday after reaching home from my a lot of activities, I still have time to do what I should finish. But because as I reached home, everything that I should do suddenly appear in my mind. So then, I choose to sleep to have more rest and don't care about anything anymore. And because of that, I have slept so earlier for some these days.
Talking about my day today.
Having English private from 11 until 12.30 then go for lunch then for bath. Around that time, my mind remembered of a lot of things again. I am kinda stress, so I got mad.
After church, hanging out to have some fresher air and planned to share everything to my leader. But then, I always felt that, still no one will really understands this feeling. I only need people to listen to what I feel right now. But I don't share because I haven't found out someone who will just sit and listen to me.
After hanging out, went to my cousin's house as always and watch RUNNING MAN for some minutes, hopefully that TV Shows really cheer me up. But when my parents have picked us to go home, there are some troubles and even though it wasn't my trouble, but I felt that both of my parents have never understand my sister's condition. I tried to make my dad realize of his bad habit, but then, suddenly I realize that I was like him too. So I stopped trying to aware him. Then suddenly my mom came again to be as like someone who get into people's problem. It just like both of my dad and sister were wrong. Yes, I know, both of them were wrong. But I dislike the way my mom talked. And as always, she was like she is all so right. Okay, I admit about a lot of things that she should control of. But I think that she doesn't need to enters people problem and also making the problem become bigger.
After we have arrived home, my bro and my sis will share food that has been bought and I asked for a spoon. My mom rant that I could eat everything I want, just eat the whole food. At that time, my heart is still in a so bad heart and I suddenly being so uncontrolled and being so mad. How I won't be so mad? My parents always spoke so rude and as you know, that is not a good words because every word that people say will really enter in our heart. And it ended with my mom's hit and bunched to me.
Well, I know this is a long entry, but when you read this, I think you will really understands how I feel.
And one thing I always felt about.
Why everything always comes and most of them is something a must for me?
I was about so stressful to think about it. Sometimes I really need to have rest of this mind. But I couldn't. Once I stopped accepting a job, the other job comes to me. And that other job I have no choice to ignore it. It has always been like that every time. And I don't have a really good time to do what I'm specialize and happy of. My head is about to keep exploding all the time.
It's hard to tell you what things that I should do only. So, it's hard to share to even a person for this. And I really think that a lot of people want to chase for a lot of things so that they also need a lot of people's helps. Well, I am willing to help but the thing that is hard for me to accept this is, I really don't have a good time with the others stuff that I wanna do.
Actually, almost everyday after reaching home from my a lot of activities, I still have time to do what I should finish. But because as I reached home, everything that I should do suddenly appear in my mind. So then, I choose to sleep to have more rest and don't care about anything anymore. And because of that, I have slept so earlier for some these days.
Talking about my day today.
Having English private from 11 until 12.30 then go for lunch then for bath. Around that time, my mind remembered of a lot of things again. I am kinda stress, so I got mad.
After church, hanging out to have some fresher air and planned to share everything to my leader. But then, I always felt that, still no one will really understands this feeling. I only need people to listen to what I feel right now. But I don't share because I haven't found out someone who will just sit and listen to me.
After hanging out, went to my cousin's house as always and watch RUNNING MAN for some minutes, hopefully that TV Shows really cheer me up. But when my parents have picked us to go home, there are some troubles and even though it wasn't my trouble, but I felt that both of my parents have never understand my sister's condition. I tried to make my dad realize of his bad habit, but then, suddenly I realize that I was like him too. So I stopped trying to aware him. Then suddenly my mom came again to be as like someone who get into people's problem. It just like both of my dad and sister were wrong. Yes, I know, both of them were wrong. But I dislike the way my mom talked. And as always, she was like she is all so right. Okay, I admit about a lot of things that she should control of. But I think that she doesn't need to enters people problem and also making the problem become bigger.
After we have arrived home, my bro and my sis will share food that has been bought and I asked for a spoon. My mom rant that I could eat everything I want, just eat the whole food. At that time, my heart is still in a so bad heart and I suddenly being so uncontrolled and being so mad. How I won't be so mad? My parents always spoke so rude and as you know, that is not a good words because every word that people say will really enter in our heart. And it ended with my mom's hit and bunched to me.
Well, I know this is a long entry, but when you read this, I think you will really understands how I feel.
Komentar